Translate a Week of Sport Statistics Into Plain English

You are trying to follow along with the post-match analysis and every number might as well be in another language. Advanced metrics look authoritative but they only help if you know what they measure. This translates the block of statistics into plain English with real-world examples of what each number means in a game.

I follow {SPORT} and have been given these statistics from last week's match or round:

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{STATISTICS_BLOCK}
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Translate these statistics into plain English for someone who is interested in the sport but not familiar with advanced metrics. For each statistic:
1. Explain what it measures
2. Say whether the numbers shown are good, average, or poor by typical standards for this sport
3. Give one real-world example of what the number means in play

Keep the whole response under 300 words. Plain prose, no jargon. Where a statistic has no clear benchmark, say so.