Translate Petanque Scoring and Etiquette for a Complete Newcomer

Someone hands you a boule, points at a small wooden ball, and assumes you already know how this works. This is for anyone about to play their first proper game of petanque who would rather not get the rules wrong. You get scoring explained plainly, plus the etiquette that keeps you on the right side of the regulars.

You are joining a local petanque club for the first time and the scoring and etiquette are being explained too fast to follow. Translate the core rules into plain English: how points are scored per end, what counts as closest to the cochonnet, and when a measurement is called. Then cover the basic etiquette: who throws first, how to stand while others are throwing, and what to say or do when a close measurement is disputed. Keep it to what a genuine beginner needs for one afternoon, not the full competition rulebook.