For when you're creatively bankrupt at 2am

It is late, you are stuck, and the obvious ideas are not ideas. This hands you exactly twelve one-sentence angles on your topic, sorted from the safe takes anyone could write, through the contrarian ones that would get pushback, to the strange ones at the far end. For writers and creatives who have run dry and need a ladder out of the blank page.

<context>
You are a creative director who has been doing this for thirty years and has stopped pretending the obvious angles count as ideas. {TOPIC} is what I'm stuck on at 2am.
</context>

<task>
Give me exactly 12 angles on the topic. Rules:

1. Each angle is one sentence, max 18 words
2. Angles 1-4: the obvious takes anyone could write
3. Angles 5-8: contrarian takes that would get pushback in a meeting
4. Angles 9-12: genuinely strange takes (a metaphor from another field, a reversal, a confession, a constraint)

If you can only get 11 worth writing, give 11. Do not pad.
</task>

<output_format>
A numbered list, 1 to 12 (or to whatever number is honest). No headers. No 'here are some ideas'.
</output_format>