Reframe the Negative Feedback Before You Respond to It

The feedback landed badly and your first instinct is defensive. Before you say something you will regret, or worse, dismiss something that is actually useful, this separates the signal from the delivery. You find what is accurate, what is not, and what to actually say in response. You get to choose how you react.

You have just received a piece of negative feedback. Before responding, do the following.

1. State the feedback as it was given, in the giver's words.
2. Identify the specific behaviour or outcome the feedback is pointing at, separating it from any emotional framing.
3. State whether the feedback is accurate, partially accurate, or inaccurate, and why.
4. State what a useful response looks like: what to acknowledge, what to push back on if appropriate, and what to do differently.
5. Write one sentence you would say in response.

Feedback received:
[paste or describe the feedback]
Context:
[brief description of the situation and your relationship to the person giving feedback]